The Akitu Festival

from The Wheel by Half Pagan

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about

Modern Pagans celebrate the vernal equinox as Ostara, a time for planting seeds, a time for tender new life emerging. Harvest festivals are in the fall, of course.

Dr. Homan would like them to know that they've got it all backwards. Springtime is really all about beer.

In ancient Babylon, the vernal equinox was celebrated by harvesting winter wheat and barley and producing beer. This festival was called the Akitu Festival.

lyrics

THE AKITU FESTIVAL

If I could time travel I know just what I’d do
Go back to ancient Babylon and ride a Lamassu
In the procession to celebrate Akitu
Turning chaos into order and drink some brew

I can think of nothing that would be better (nothing better, nothing better)
Than to slap the face of King Nebuchadnezzar (slap slap slap Nebu—chadnezzar)
So freaking hard that he produces a tear (produces a tear, produces a tear)
So we can harvest barley and make more beer (harvest barley and make some beer)

CHORUS
I need to – Akitu! Akitu!
Drink a brew – Akitu! Akitu!
It’s a spring celebration of barley fermentation
I’m going to drink beer in Babylon --Akitu!

On the first new moon after vernal equinox
We’d thresh the barley from its stocks
And we drink beer with my Babylonian posse
And we’d get drunk and sing the hymn to Ninkasi!

I can think of nothing that ‘d be as great (be as great, be as great)
Than to ride my lamassu through the Ishtar Gate (riding my lamassu through her gate)
And then take my beer to Etemenanki (drink my beer at Etemenanki)
I love that ziggurat so staunchly (love that ziggurat love it staunchly)

CHORUS

There is nothing that I’d further relish
Than to watch the whole Enuma Elish
And when Tiamat died I’d lead the cheer
And then of course we’d drink more beer!

Please Marduk please come to E.Sagila (Please Marduk please, please Marduk please)
The Babylonians are just dying to see ya (Please Marduk please, please Marduk please)
And the most important point, who knew? (I never never knew, did you?)
You don’t give beer to your lamassu (a drunk lamassu is a serious issue)

CHORUS

Let’s all go to the Akitu Festival
Where the numbers are all sexigesimal
Far far above the land of Ereshkigal
A Babylonian spectacle
Etemenanki looks so ascendable
Ishtar’s ladies look so sexual
Vernal lunar calendrical
Let’s all go to the Akitu Festival

credits

from The Wheel, released May 1, 2022
Words and music composed by Dr. Homan

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Half Pagan New Orleans, Louisiana

We're a rock band based in Bulbancha. You might call it New Orleans. Sometimes we do songs about cemetery picnics or the mythology of ancient Babylon. We're Half Pagan.

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